Charlie: “Hey, Clyde, if a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to see it, does it make a noise?”
Clyde: “Technically, yes, Charlie. Nothing prevents the tree’s kinetic energy from being transferred to the air and ground. Wait! I’ll Google it. Okay, Merriam-Webster has three defs; one, it’s ‘a particular auditory impression; two, it’s the sensation perceived by the sense of hearing; and c, it’s the mechanical radiant energy that is transmitted by waves in a material medium (such as air) and is the objective cause of hearing.’ So, in definitions one and two, an observer or hearer is involved. That would mean the falling tree causes no sound even though it is a process that generates ‘waves in a material medium’ that would in definition one cause an auditory impression. But definition c gives us an out because it includes ‘mechanical radiant energy that is transferred by longitudinal waves in a material medium’ that would envelope the falling tree regardless of an observer. So, I guess, as long as an observer is involved in the definition, I mean, a hearer, then a tree that falls in the absence of a person makes no sound. Silly, but that’s want the definitions imply.”
Charlie: “Okay, here’s another one. If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there, is it visible?”
Clyde: “What?”
Charlie: “Well, I just read an article that says scientists are working on creating transparent wood. * You know that old expression about not seeing the forest for the trees? Heck, if they do that, we won’t see standing trees, let along falling trees. I can hear the conversation between a cop and a puzzled and slightly dazed guy who is standing next to a wrecked car with a U-shaped dent in his bumper and hood:
‘So, how fast were you going?’
‘Officer, honestly, I haven’t been drinking and I wasn’t driving fast. I just didn’t see the tree.’
Invisible wood. Yeah, that’ll be our next safety problem.
‘Honey, what’s that bruise on your head? Did you walk into the door again?’
‘Damn invisible wood! I’m installing metal doors.’
Yep, gonna be a safety issue for sure. And it’s going to affect business, the economy, and climate.”
Clyde: “How is invisible wood going to affect the economy and climate?”
Charlie: “How’s anyone going to find the lumber yard? What’s that going to do to places like Home Depot, Lowe’s, and 84 Lumber? People will be driving around, burning gas they don’t need to burn, trying to find those places. The global warming. Lord, the global warming! And what if people want a wood-burning stove? Will they know they bought the wood chips by feel? And in those quaint mountain lodges, will flames just seem to spring from nothing in the lobby fireplace like the Cosmos originating from Nothing in the Big Bang?”
Clyde: “Now you have me thinking about all the problems caused by invisible wood. Can’t have a log cabin if you want privacy. Won’t know where the chair is before you sit. You’ll be asking where you put your pencil. And your desk? It’ll look like your desktop computer simply defies gravity. Visitors will see your messy closet. You’ll bang your head on the headboard. And what about getting a splinter? Who’s going to know where to pull it out with the tweezers? After a big wind storm, we’ll say, ‘I think his tree fell on his house, but I don’t know. Something definitely crushed the roof.’ And those quiet walks in the woods? Might as well just walk across the desert in Nevada.”
Charlie: “Yeah. Invisible wood would be a bummer for poets and painters, too. Think about Robert Frost’s ‘Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening’:
‘Whose woods these are I think I know/His house is in the village though;/He will not see me stopping here/ To watch his woods fill up with snow/…/The woods are lovely, dark and deep,/But I have promises to keep,/And miles to go before I sleep,/And miles to go before I sleep.’
Heck, Frost might just as well have been walking across a snowfield in Greenland or over a glacier in Antarctica, watching rocks fill up with snow to the horizon.”
Clyde: “You’ve hit on it. Invisible trees would be bad for all romantics. What about all those nature painters like Thomas Cole and his imitators in the so-called Hudson River School or Bob Ross and his ‘happy little trees’? Or, just thought about it, what of Ansel Adams, the photographer and all Adams-wannabes with cell phone cameras? Yosemite would just look like a bunch of granite. And speaking of Nature, how are the woodpeckers going to know where to peck? Or owls where to sit? In fact, there’ll be dead birds everywhere as they run into trees the way they fly into windows.”
Charlie: “And the mail. What about envelopes? Invisible paper means that I can’t send five bucks in an envelope to a college-age niece. Wait! What about paper money? It’ll be just green ink on invisible paper. And what if someone uses invisible ink to write on invisible paper? Someone has to stop this invention before it destroys our society, but how can I write a letter in protest?”
Clyde: “Email. But you’re right. Not all inventions improve life. Lots of them are cause for concern. I don’t even want to think of Musk’s experimental Neuralink brain chips ** unless they help my brain see invisible wood. But, hey, inventing is what we do, and not seeing the full consequences of our inventions is just one of our flaws. Someone thought atomic bombs were a good idea, also. Wasn’t that Einstein and Szilard who wrote that famous letter to Roosevelt? Inventing, it’s what we do. Thinking ahead? It’s what we don’t do.”
*Yirka, Bob. 2 Feb. 2021. A new way to make wood transparent, stronger and lighter than glass. Phys.org. Online at https://phys.org/news/2021-02-wood-transparent-stronger-lighter-glass.html Accessed February 3, 2021.
**Grad, Peter. 2 Feb 2012 Musk’s Neuralink creates ‘happy monkeys’ who play Pong with their minds. TechXplore. Online at https://phys.org/news/2021-02-wood-transparent-stronger-lighter-glass.html Accessed February 3, 2021.
Clyde: “Technically, yes, Charlie. Nothing prevents the tree’s kinetic energy from being transferred to the air and ground. Wait! I’ll Google it. Okay, Merriam-Webster has three defs; one, it’s ‘a particular auditory impression; two, it’s the sensation perceived by the sense of hearing; and c, it’s the mechanical radiant energy that is transmitted by waves in a material medium (such as air) and is the objective cause of hearing.’ So, in definitions one and two, an observer or hearer is involved. That would mean the falling tree causes no sound even though it is a process that generates ‘waves in a material medium’ that would in definition one cause an auditory impression. But definition c gives us an out because it includes ‘mechanical radiant energy that is transferred by longitudinal waves in a material medium’ that would envelope the falling tree regardless of an observer. So, I guess, as long as an observer is involved in the definition, I mean, a hearer, then a tree that falls in the absence of a person makes no sound. Silly, but that’s want the definitions imply.”
Charlie: “Okay, here’s another one. If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there, is it visible?”
Clyde: “What?”
Charlie: “Well, I just read an article that says scientists are working on creating transparent wood. * You know that old expression about not seeing the forest for the trees? Heck, if they do that, we won’t see standing trees, let along falling trees. I can hear the conversation between a cop and a puzzled and slightly dazed guy who is standing next to a wrecked car with a U-shaped dent in his bumper and hood:
‘So, how fast were you going?’
‘Officer, honestly, I haven’t been drinking and I wasn’t driving fast. I just didn’t see the tree.’
Invisible wood. Yeah, that’ll be our next safety problem.
‘Honey, what’s that bruise on your head? Did you walk into the door again?’
‘Damn invisible wood! I’m installing metal doors.’
Yep, gonna be a safety issue for sure. And it’s going to affect business, the economy, and climate.”
Clyde: “How is invisible wood going to affect the economy and climate?”
Charlie: “How’s anyone going to find the lumber yard? What’s that going to do to places like Home Depot, Lowe’s, and 84 Lumber? People will be driving around, burning gas they don’t need to burn, trying to find those places. The global warming. Lord, the global warming! And what if people want a wood-burning stove? Will they know they bought the wood chips by feel? And in those quaint mountain lodges, will flames just seem to spring from nothing in the lobby fireplace like the Cosmos originating from Nothing in the Big Bang?”
Clyde: “Now you have me thinking about all the problems caused by invisible wood. Can’t have a log cabin if you want privacy. Won’t know where the chair is before you sit. You’ll be asking where you put your pencil. And your desk? It’ll look like your desktop computer simply defies gravity. Visitors will see your messy closet. You’ll bang your head on the headboard. And what about getting a splinter? Who’s going to know where to pull it out with the tweezers? After a big wind storm, we’ll say, ‘I think his tree fell on his house, but I don’t know. Something definitely crushed the roof.’ And those quiet walks in the woods? Might as well just walk across the desert in Nevada.”
Charlie: “Yeah. Invisible wood would be a bummer for poets and painters, too. Think about Robert Frost’s ‘Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening’:
‘Whose woods these are I think I know/His house is in the village though;/He will not see me stopping here/ To watch his woods fill up with snow/…/The woods are lovely, dark and deep,/But I have promises to keep,/And miles to go before I sleep,/And miles to go before I sleep.’
Heck, Frost might just as well have been walking across a snowfield in Greenland or over a glacier in Antarctica, watching rocks fill up with snow to the horizon.”
Clyde: “You’ve hit on it. Invisible trees would be bad for all romantics. What about all those nature painters like Thomas Cole and his imitators in the so-called Hudson River School or Bob Ross and his ‘happy little trees’? Or, just thought about it, what of Ansel Adams, the photographer and all Adams-wannabes with cell phone cameras? Yosemite would just look like a bunch of granite. And speaking of Nature, how are the woodpeckers going to know where to peck? Or owls where to sit? In fact, there’ll be dead birds everywhere as they run into trees the way they fly into windows.”
Charlie: “And the mail. What about envelopes? Invisible paper means that I can’t send five bucks in an envelope to a college-age niece. Wait! What about paper money? It’ll be just green ink on invisible paper. And what if someone uses invisible ink to write on invisible paper? Someone has to stop this invention before it destroys our society, but how can I write a letter in protest?”
Clyde: “Email. But you’re right. Not all inventions improve life. Lots of them are cause for concern. I don’t even want to think of Musk’s experimental Neuralink brain chips ** unless they help my brain see invisible wood. But, hey, inventing is what we do, and not seeing the full consequences of our inventions is just one of our flaws. Someone thought atomic bombs were a good idea, also. Wasn’t that Einstein and Szilard who wrote that famous letter to Roosevelt? Inventing, it’s what we do. Thinking ahead? It’s what we don’t do.”
*Yirka, Bob. 2 Feb. 2021. A new way to make wood transparent, stronger and lighter than glass. Phys.org. Online at https://phys.org/news/2021-02-wood-transparent-stronger-lighter-glass.html Accessed February 3, 2021.
**Grad, Peter. 2 Feb 2012 Musk’s Neuralink creates ‘happy monkeys’ who play Pong with their minds. TechXplore. Online at https://phys.org/news/2021-02-wood-transparent-stronger-lighter-glass.html Accessed February 3, 2021.
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